Archive for January 20th, 2012
A New Year & A New Outlook
It’s 2012 already, though I must say that of all the years I am more pleased and ready for the change in date than usual. For some reason 2011 just never quite felt right to me. Probably because I had been mentally preparing myself for a full five years to graduate in 2010, but was pushed back to 2011 (after taking a year off from school) combined with the fact that I tend to prefer even numbers.
This past year was an exciting though somewhat rocky one too, so I’m quite ready to move on to bigger and better things. Between the bitter sweet goodbyes of graduation, some major progress on the book I’m writing, and a bought of homelessness followed by moving into our new (and very lovely) apartment in the area I’ve spent years pinning for it’s been an emotional roller coaster. I’ve loved every minute of it.
The one thing I really took away from 2011 though, was the way in which I managed to endure all the stresses without loosing hope. I started a regular mediation routine, and spent a great deal more time at my altar (especially as we headed for the homeless stage). It’s through trials that we learn more about ourselves, and I have to say I was surprised at what came out during this particularly trying time in my life. Rather than succumb to a fresh bought of depression or lash out at my loved ones, I found myself sitting down to meditate or work a ritual with a calm and completely hopeful outlook on the situation.
One simple image kept me going through it all: I pictured myself at the center of a swirling tornado. Time and time again I asked the divine to help me stand calmly and firmly in the eye of the storm, and my desire was granted. Through all the chaos job hunting and the stress of moving out with no idea where we would end up next, I remained optimistic. My partner and I took everything in stride, living day by day and managed to bond rather than lash out at one another. It was an amazing experience, and it’s left me hungry for more.
If I were to hope for only one thing in 2012, it would be to find myself permanently housed at the eye of the storm.
